Sexcetera - Fall 2012

I write an opinion column in my school’s newspaper, The Pioneer, called “Sexcetera.” It’s a column on relationships, sex, and sexuality, from a perspective I’m trying to keep sex-positive, feminist, and inclusive. I’ve been doing it for months, but (perhaps unsurprisingly, given my tendency to get busy and neglect the blog), I haven’t mentioned it at all here.

Since it would be silly to post each individual column now, I figured I’d post a general directory of what I’ve written this semester.

Columns

  1. Open Discussion Makes Sex More Satisfying” (2012/09/13) – My first column, in which I make the case for opening the conversation about sex.
  2. Defining ‘Normal’ Needlessly Moralizes Sex” (2012/09/27) – Someone wrote in to ask what was “normal” when it came to sex. In this column, I discuss why “normal” should be irrelevant to your sexuality.
  3. Open Relationships Necessitate Nuanced View of Cheating” (2012/10/11) – The blurb and headline don’t really do this justice, but in this column, I explain how cheating is far less about the acts, and far more about betraying your partner’s trust, as open relationships show.
  4. Runaway Sex-Positivism Creates Obligations, Overlooks Nonsexual” (2012/10/18) – Though I very strongly consider myself a sex-positive person, as I argue here, that position needs to be carefully navigated so as not to become problematic.
  5. Neither Party Stellar on Sex Ed” (2012/10/25) – Leading up to the election, I argue that neither of the two parties provides a truly useful, empowering vision of sexual education.
  6. Naturalistic Fallacy a Danger in Sex Talk” (2012/10/31) – Returning to a previous letter, I argue against thinking about sex in terms of what’s “natural” or not.
  7. Cultural Conditioning No Excuse for Selfish Sex” (2012/11/8) – Our tastes don’t spring up in a vacuum, but are informed by our culture–which, unfortunately, is sexist as all hell. Because of that, sometimes, “I think that’s weird” isn’t a good enough excuse for being a selfish lover.
  8. Awareness First Step to Relieving Sexual Pain” (2012/11/29) – Chronic pain during intercourse can be difficult to deal with, and even harder to talk to a doctor about. In this column, I describe how it signifies that something isn’t right, and how you can deal with that.

Web Posts

  1. Who I Am (and Why That Matters)” (2012/10/10) – If I’m gonna be giving advice, I figure it’s best to disclaim who I am and where I’m coming from.
  2. We Can Work It Out: Talking about Sex” (2012/10/11) – How do you start talking to a sexual partner about sex? Is it really that important? I answer those questions and provide advice to a letter-writer.
  3. Radical Subtlety and Smartphone Ads” (2012/12/7) – As important as sex-positivity is, it can sometimes be subtle in its presentation, like in a recent smartphone ad by Samsung.

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